Good Vibes

Its offical.

I'm so over negativity. I'd like to think that most of us as human beings are pretty positive, but lately my circumstances have been less that ideal.

Ideas on being more positive?

Thanks in advance

Kendra

Sunshine!

Today has been awesome

Go take a walk outside.
Enjoy the sunshine and the clean air

Its beauitful

-Kenni

Inner Battle of Sorts

SO...

I have pretty much decided to write this like no body is reading it. Ever.

It makes me much more truthful and myself- honestly... I think it is more fun too.


I recently had someone very important in my life peace out for the time being. And I miss him. A lot. Like every single second he is on my mind and I cry at night because I didn't get to talk to him. Kinda disgusting, I know.

I have never been one to be for the mushy feely moments. In fact, when I am upset and I need to cry it out to someone else, it usually is like a five minute affair. But I have been having THE hardest time with this situation.

I know that I need to wait. Wait for me to get over him. Wait for the time that I can be friends with him. Wait for the longing to disappear. But this whole waiting thing is more like torture.

The worst part is- I want to be happy. I want to be my care-free self that doesn't need anyone or anything to be happy. I want to be able to smile at a stranger and feel alright with myself. I want to wake up every morning just grateful that I am alive and I get to share the day with others.

Unfortunately, things haven't been that way. I find myself thinking that it would be better if I stayed in bed all day and that maybe I shouldn't do anything because obviously the world isn't right. Some days I even think how great it would be to die- just so I don't have to do this life struggle thing anymore.

Before you get your panties in a bunch-
I am being dramatic when I think all these things. Most the time I think of them in a comical, joking way. But I do still think them- and I didn't use to.

Its freakin confusing.

I am having this inner battle between wanting to be happy and being held back.
Talk about being caught up in something

Now I don't really have a happy ending to this story like I usually do.
I just needed to have it written down. Out of my head and in ink somewhere else.

But- For the record. I have decided that I will vigilantly press forward trying to be happy ALL the time, even if it takes me some good amount of time.  

I have been trying- Forcing myself to go out and socialize... Doing my makeup and hair everyday... Making myself eat and whatnot. And part of me is happy. But part of me is still a drama baby. So I am hoping that in time, that happiness will grow and I can figure this all out.
If not- I will be complaining to you again ;)
Be prepared.

Well- Its late. And I am tired. 

Goodnight Y'all.

Kenni
 

Bad Days

I saw this today.

Gave me the strength to smile. This week has definitely been a bad one for me.

But I will not let that stop me. I am SO much stronger then the struggle.

- Kenni

Update

I think I am going to start writing on here again. Mostly because I have nothing else to do.
Currently going to school at the most wonderful USU.
Its cold here. Like always freezing cold. But much like Elsa, the cold never bothered me anyway.
I am taking art history- which is not quite as boring as it seems- and a drawing class. I am always in the company of my moleskine companion. I doodle in him a lot.
The people here are friendly enough- but I seem to have a hard time moving past friendly to actually becoming a friend.
Eh.
Totally missing my best friend right now fyi. SO if I complain about it, slap me a little until I feel better about life again.

Well. That's all I have for updates now.

Peace out yo.
Kenni

Hope

Here is another printable. 

This is for my friend Hope who recently embarked on a different journey.

Dodgeball

Do you recall ever playing dodgeball as a child at school?
 We would gather together in a group, and two team captains would be chosen. Now the team captains didn't actually hold that much authority in the game. They couldn't change rules and they are not allowed to command others around as captains of armies do.
 However, the team captains where in charge of the most sacred and nerve-wrecking aspect of the game; choosing the teams. The captains would take turns picking individuals for their team and one by one, every child would be assigned to a team. When you would be picked, the captain was virtually saying that he wanted you, even if it was only for your athletic ability. Being wanted by the captain was a great feeling.
The first ones that were picked by the captains where almost always the athletic boys, the ones that have proven themselves in the past. These boys would confidently walk to their new captain with a certain smugness, and who could have thought less of them for it; after all, they where the first ones chosen. Once all the athletic boys have been chosen, the captains would pick out the more athletic and cute girls and the rest of the boys. These lucky individuals had the privileged of still being wanted, and at this point in selecting teams, they knew that they still had some value and were an addition to their teammates.
The last group was usually full of misfits- kids with broken arms or glasses, those who had absolutely no athletic ability and those that no body wanted on their team anyway. Usually this last group only consisted of a handful of children, so by now, most had been picked and had their worth proven by the captain. Now was the "tricky" part; the captains had to pick their poison. All the remaining options where like poison. So the captains would still take turns, but rather then picking those who would add to the team, they would pick those that would take away the least. So the captains would reluctantly add members to their team until there was just one kid left.    
The last kid that nobody wanted.
Not only was he or she most likely terrible at sports, but they were also extremely unpopular. They would end up on the team with less players, but unlike the others, they where not picked by the captains. No, they were assigned to, the dismay of, a captain.
The child that wasn't picked, but forced to play the game anyways.
Being last was discouraging, and it made you hate the game. Why would you want to participate in something that no one thinks you can do?
I can't even tell you how awful it feels to be unwanted by everyone.

Soo sooo grateful for lesson manuals and temples! ...

Soo sooo grateful for lesson manuals and temples! What blessings!

Today I am soo sooo grateful for my Awesome sister...

Today I am soo sooo grateful for my Awesome sister :)

Gratitude tidbit of the day: Totally got off work ...

Gratitude tidbit of the day: Totally got off work early and my watercolor painting is just about finished :) Huhzah!

Remember that one time...

So remember that one time that I was supposed to work on some virtues... 

Well I sorta forgot to try so, I am going to start over! Every month I am going to focus on one of the following virtues, starting with Gratitude, Patience, Sincerity/ Honesty, Frugality, Attentiveness and finally, Moderation. 

So until March 14 I will be thinking of ways to be more grateful and posting random things I am grateful for.
Be prepared... 

You may or may not get spammed....

Also, happy valentines day! 

For all of those individuals who are single, here is an old favorite of mine :)

Love yall! 

Kendra

"...Lay aside the things of this world, and seek f...

"...Lay aside the things of this world, and seek for the things of a better" -D&C 25:10

Glossophobia

Public speaking is a tricky thing and everyone has to do it at some point. As Ralph Waldo Emerson put it "Happy is the hearing man; unhappy the speaking man." Have you ever opened your mouth to recite a speech and found the words had somehow magically disappeared into the air, as if your audience somehow managed to take them right out of your mouth? If you have, you are not alone. A good percentage of the public has in some way, shape and form has experienced this uncomfortable and even terrifying phenomenon known as glossophobia, or fear of public speaking.

Lisa Fritscher describes this public speaking fear as "remarkably common"; a whopping 75% of the public have glossophobia. So with the phobia being as common as it is, why does our society so heavily depend on public presentations in everything from our careers to learning the alphabet in kindergarten? Somehow it is not only beneficial for one to be able to speak in public, it is necessary. Why are we so afraid of something that is so vital to our success? Daniel J. DeNoon answers this question by explaining that although glossophobics are afraid to speak in public, there is a large portion of this group who suffer in less degrees and can therefore speak without getting sick and in addition, there are many helps and aids out there that help catalyze the courage needed to overcome this fear. What I want to briefly explore today is the different types of anxiety that one can experience and the methods that are out there to help people overcome their fears. 

There are two types of people who experience glossophobia, chances are if you fear public speaking, you are going to fit into one category or the other; habituaters and sensitizers. If you are a Habituaters, you have a lower anxiety traits and the worse part of speaking for you is getting those first words out of your mouth. Habitauters usually say something along the lines of  'I was so nervous when I started but by the time I finished it wasn't so bad. I even wished I had more time.' According to Paul L. Witt, what happens is these types of speakers have habituated, or have "gotten used to the context of public speaking" 

Fortunately for habituaters, getting over their fear is relatively easy, they just have to find something that is motivating enough to get them into the hot seat, like an assignment for class or a presentation that their job depends on. For people like myself things are not so easy. Whenever I speak in public (which is far too much for my own taste), I start the speech just a little nervous, or nervous enough to be a little uncomfortable and somehow end the speech nearly falling to my knees. 

People who experience this are known as sensitizers, going through the exact opposite of the habituaters experience. Rather than focusing on what you are saying or where you are going with an argument, sensitizers tend to find the little things that "ruin" their speech like trembling hands or knobbly knees. They get really into the speech, just in the worst ways possible. And when the speech is over,DeNoon says that "sensitizers don't relax. In fact, they become even more anxious."

So we understand a little about the different types of glossophobics, but how can we manage this fear? 

With glossophobia, there is no such thing as unavailable help. There are training courses, self-help material in every bookstore and organizations that that help you improve and fine tune your speaking ability and give you the confidence that you need to succeed. For those who may experience a more severe case (much like myself), there are therapies that can help you manage your fear, by taking yourself out of the panic, calm yourself down and boost your confidence levels. If all else fails, there are several medications in the market that your doctor can prescribe to help you in your weakest moments.

Toastmaters is an organization that is dedicated to helping people overcome their fear. They have an active community, classes that you can take and advice from leaders. On Toastmasters website, you can find helpful tips in preparing for a presentation like "know your material", "concentrate on the message- not the medium" and "relax" all directed for those who feel anxiety towards speaking in front of others at any degree.

Finishing off his earlier statement, Emerson goes on saying "speech is power: speech is to persuade, to convert, to compel." If you experience public speaking fear, great or small. You can know that you are not alone. Wether you are a sensitizer or a habituater, you can find strength and others just like you. There is help out there for you and if you choose to overcome your fear, you will find success in your work, school and personal life. The power to speak without fear gives you power to excel in life.

Sources

http://www.webmd.com/anxiety-panic/guide/20061101/fear-public-speaking

http://phobias.about.com/od/phobiaslist/a/glossophobia.htm

http://www.glossophobia.com/index.html 

http://www.toastmasters.org/tips.asp
http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/keywords/speaking.html

Are we just going through the motions, or are we t...

Are we just going through the motions, or are we truely converted to the gospel of Christ?

Just like Ben

Benjamin Franklin was quite the inspirational man.

Did you know what he created a list of 13 virtues that he wanted to work on? He would pick a virtue and he would work on it until he felt he achieved that virtue and then move on to the next. I have been thinking, and I want to try the same thing out.

His 13 original virtues were Temperance, Silence, Order, Resolution, Frugality, Industry, Sincerity, Justice, Moderation, Cleanliness, Tranquility, Chastity, and Humility. I have picked my own that I believe I need to work on.

Gratitude

Patience

Sincerity/ Honesty

Frugality

Attentiveness

Moderation

So here is how it is going to work, I am going to pick a virtue and work on it for a month. As soon as that month is up, I will move on to the next one and (hopefully) write what I have learned. So for this month, I have already started on Gratitude (and it is SO hard!). I am excited! :D Hopefully it all goes well! I will keep you updated on any game changers

<3 Kendra Ann

Life is like a Road Trip

Life is like a road trip. Unless of course you are actually on a road trip, then it IS a road trip. haha

So finally got to go on a mini road trip (cross that off the list)! It was mini because it was only like 3 hours, but that is probably about as long as I can last in a car without losing it.

On our way to the most fabulous castle dale! 

 We are silly :)

 Two of the most amazing women ever! Annnndd, me. hehe

Crawdad fishing, ATVs, Dinosaur tracks, Goblin Valley, Dancing, Fireworks and getting thrown from a horse. It was an adventure for sure! :)

Go have your own adventure! 

\\Kendra Kay

Necklace Organizer DIY

This is super fun, efficient and is a really nice addition to the bedroom!

 Just 3 easy steps!


Step 1- Get a plain bulletin board (I had already put mine on the wall but it is probably easier to wait until you are all done before you go mounting anything)

Step 2- Decorate! Decorate! Decorate!! I used some old miss-matched scrapbooking paper, some sticker letters and stuck them all together with those little flat bullets. You can get a little creative, just don't go overboard because we will need some room for the necklaces!

Step 3- Time to add the Necklaces!! Just stick a whole bunch of thumb tacks to the board (I used clear ones but it would be fun to find some that match your board). Once all your thumb tacks are on, just hang the necklaces over and there you go! Ta-da!! :)

 

Have an awesome day!! :)
Kendra Ann

{ One down.. }

Got another something marked off my summer to-do list!

Finally saw Foster the People, and I gotta say it was possibly the best concert ever! :)

Emily and I about to Rock out ;)

 

 

 

If I had one picture to describe the night, this would definitely be it!

If you haven't heard much of FTP check them out here!
They are awesome :)

Have a Sweet Tuesday :)
Make a friend ;)

{ I am his Daughter }

The photos in the magazines
Don't dictate who I'm supposed to be
The world can't recognize, all that I am inside
But I know in His eyes, I am a part of, the bigger picture,

There's so much more to me
He helps me see that I have so much to offer
I am His daughter
He loves me the way I am,
He's my strength when I stand
He is my King, and my Father,
I am His daughter.

The people on the TV screen,
The leaders, rulers, and queens
I watch them shape the world,
And though I'm just a girl, I still know for sure,
That I am a part of, the bigger picture

There's so much more to me
He helps me see that I have so much to offer
I am His daughter
He loves me the way I am,
He's my strength when I stand
He is my King, and my Father,
I am His daughter

And when I'm feeling small,
And wondering if I'll ever, find courage to stand tall
Through His love I remember

There's so much more to me
He helps me to see that I have so much to offer
I am His daughter
He loves me the way I am
He's my strength when I stand
He is my King, and my Father,
I am His daughter

We cry so we can laugh another day

We cry so we can laugh another day